That's What Friends Are For
by The Watch Stander
Summary: After The Mission To Save Atlantis from the Asurans, John reflects on the cost.


**That's What Friends Are For**

Rating: Angst and more Angst, Sheppard, Carson, McKay.

Disclaimer: Stargate Atlantis is owned by MGM/Sony. No profit made on writing this, just a whole lot of fun!

Takes place after The Return: My version anyhow.

Thanks to all the wonderful people who read my stories and review. It makes it all worth while!

The Watch Stander © 2006

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John Sheppard sat quietly on the infirmary bed in Atlantis, waiting his turn for medical attention from the small group of doctors that were here from the Daedalus. Carson was busy tending to the wounded , doing triage where necessary; mostly on Marines from the ship as they had been injured the worst.

The city had been saved by both John's team and the timely arrival of the Daedalus with her marine contingent. Atlantis was theirs once more.

While Sheppard sat here with a shoulder wound waiting to be treated, Teyla and Ronon were searching the city for any more Asurans that might have escaped. Rodney had managed to adjust the scanners to pick up their so called 'life' signs.

Having the Daedalus arrive in the nick of time had been a blessing;

if only things had turned out better he wouldn't be sitting here feeling like this, wanting to go hide somewhere to be alone and somehow deal with his feelings of failure and regret.

His team plan had worked and the city was theirs, but it had cost them dearly. A key part of their plan was for Rodney and Carson to enter the central control station in the middle of the city. There Rodney's computer virus would be entered into the main system. He had written it using DOS as the language part of a Trojan virus, knowing the Asurans wouldn't recognize it. Once uploaded it would literally enter their ranks and spread deleting parts of their programming rendering the Asurans harmless. But first, McKay had to shut down Atlantis, so the virus could run unimpeded throughout their systems. If there was anyone who knew the workings of Atlantis, it was one genius scientist, Rodney McKay. The scientist planned on shutting down the city's operations from that station by blowing out the relays. The Asurans wouldn't be able to get their defenses back up in time to stop the virus from spreading.

Rodney and Carson had barricaded themselves in the control station while placing c-4 explosives and setting the overload to the main conductor. They would escape using one of the transporters.

This whole scenario replayed through Sheppard's mind as he

remembered calling Rodney and telling him the Asurans were on the way.

"McKay, you and Carson need to get out of there now! They're coming your way."

"Keep your shirt on Colonel, I just need a few more minutes to upload the program. " The scientist's voice was shaky, showing how truly terrified he was of the approaching enemy; an enemy that had tortured him the last time he was their captive.

When Sheppard looked at his scanner it showed the control room surrounded by Asurans. It would only be a matter of minutes before they would be through the door to Rodney and Carson's position.

"Rodney!"

"All right ,all right!, ...Crap!" Rodney's voice suddenly sounded desperate.

"McKay, What's going on?"

"They're all around us! There's no time to set the explosive timer and get out of here. Clear the area I'm going to blow it manually in 20 seconds."

"Rodney, leave it! You and Carson get out of there." Sheppard was yelling, knowing what the scientist was about to do. It was Doranda all over again, but he wasn't there to pull McKay away to safety.

"There's no time! They're not torturing me again! I've sent Carson in the transporter to you...

Goodbye, Sheppard."

It came out as more of a whisper, but Sheppard heard it, two words that he never wanted to hear, the same two word farewell John had given Rodney in the past. A feeling of dread went through him.

_This couldn't be happening, not Rodney..._

"No! McKay, don't do this!"

Sheppard's frantic shout was followed by a huge explosion from down the hallway; his heart practically stopped as the floor shook. Suddenly, he found himself leaning against the wall ; eyes unfocused as he tried to work his thoughts around what had just happened. His eyes began to blur; realizing what the silence on the radio meant...

_This can't be happening_

Carson suddenly appeared by his side, yelling,"Where's Rodney, he was suppose to be right behind me?"

The doctor looked around frantically and then back at Sheppard ,who was taking in deep gulps of air; trying desperately to focus and get control over his emotions.

Sheppard knew they needed to get on with the mission; despite the fact that a big piece of him had just been blown to smithereens, along with one very arrogant scientist.

What also hurt, was knowing there was nothing he could have done to stop it.

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So here he sat, thinking about the friend he'd just lost a short time ago. That part of the city had been literally destroyed and they couldn't get near it even now.

But then, what did it matter, no one could possibly have survived the explosion.

As far as Sheppard was concerned, Atlantis had lost one of the most remarkable people that had ever walked its halls and even saving Atlantis wasn't worth the price of losing Rodney McKay.

Flowing through his mind were many regrets about things not said or done, but one that probably hurt the most ,was not being there for Rodney when he had called from area 51; wanting to talk about how unhappy he was. John had cut the phone connection before McKay had finished his last thought; not wanting to have to deal with Rodney's constant complaining.

_A real friend wouldn't have done that, I should have listened._ _They would never finish that conversation..._

From the very beginning theirs had been the odd friendship, snarking at each other and behaving like two kids. Who would have thought they'd become best friends.

Remembering all of this hurt more than he thought possible. Rodney, with his snarky, irritating, and manic personality was gone, and Sheppard knew he would miss him terribly.

Once more his eyes threatened to water and he wiped them with the back of his sleeve, hardly noticing it was his wounded arm. Nothing could hurt more than losing a friend, nothing...

Carson came walking over toward him and John wiped his face again not wanting the doctor to see him like this. There would be time later for the hurt to begin, right now he had to be Atlantis's Military Commander.

"Colonel, how are you doing, son?" Sadness was reflected in his voice, Rodney had been his friend as well.

John thought for someone, who was suppose to be such an arrogant pain in the ass, McKay had a lot of real friends; people who cared about him and who looked out for him. Carson Beckett was one of those.

"I'm fine, just need a band-aid," John's heart wasn't in the reply, somehow he was just too drained.

Carson nodded, "Let me see how bad it is."

He was about to help Sheppard remove his Jacket, when a loud commotion coming from the doorway to the infirmary, made them both turn around.

Several orderlies were pushing a Gurney with a patient on it. Suddenly afraid that another one of his team had been injured; both he and Carson headed toward the commotion.

Carson arrived first and came to a sudden stop beside the Gurney, "Dear Lord!"

John practically bumped into him trying to see who the patient was, fearing the worst.

_Is it Ronon or Teyla?_

The next instant his heart seemed to stop, for buried under several layers of bandages was one Rodney McKay, alive... The room started to tilt.

Carson grabbed Shepard's arm to keep him steady on his feet.

"Where did you find him?",the doctor asked ,while still supporting Colonel Sheppard.

Another voice answered him as Colonel Caldwell entered the infirmary. "You can Thank Hermiad. "

He smiled at Carson and Sheppard, "While monitoring your radio frequency, Hermiad realized what McKay was about to do. He was able to transport McKay just seconds after the initial blast. Dr. McKay got pretty banged up, but we were able to stabilize him on Daedalus. I thought it would be better for him to be in your infirmary, Dr. Beckett; being under your care and in familiar surroundings should help him to recover faster."

John couldn't find the right words to utter ,so he flashed a grateful look Caldwell's way; then turned back to look at a very pale McKay, who seemed to be asleep. Instead of a hospital top covering him, the scientist had bandages wrapped around his chest, arms, and one large plaster patch across his entire forehead.

He had never looked so good, as far as John was concerned.

The Med team resumed pushing the Gurney toward the area designated for critical cases and then set up the equipment next to the bed to monitor McKay.

"I think our Rodney has just made another friend in high places!"Carson smiled happily, relieved that their friend had been saved by the Asgard.

John was still shaky, but smiled as well, "Yes, I think he has at that."

End

AN: I love happy endings! Yes:)


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